ClaytonвЂ™s wife, Jane (Margot Robbie), insists on coming along because thatвЂ™s what Jane does.

Jackson), who comes to Clayton for help compiling evidence that the king is, indeed, enslaving the indigenous population. ItвЂ™s the job of the Belgian kingвЂ™s nefarious envoy (Christoph Waltz) to lure Clayton back under false pretenses, and his unwitting accomplice in that task is George Washington Williams (Samuel L. If I followed it correctly, a tribal chief will hand over a load of diamonds that Belgium needs to finance its burgeoning slave trade in return for Tarzan, who committed some unspecified-until-later offense against him. Why does Clayton go back to Africa? It takes a lot of setup. His splendid backstory, meanwhile, is sprinkled through the action in brief, hazy flashbacks, so the whole thing feels like a sequel to a movie that was never made. It opens with Alexander SkarsgГҐrd as Tarzan - nГ©В John Clayton, Lord of Greystoke - back in his baronial English manse, where heвЂ™s вЂњhybridizing coconuts,вЂќ with no intention of returning to the Belgian Congo. The new Tarzan film, The Legend of Tarzan, plays as if a dog ate part of the script. Fifty years later, Robert Towne wrote a script that honored its source, but it was so mucked-up by English director Hugh Hudson that Towne gave the credit to his dog. The old Johnny Weissmuller pictures dumbed Tarzan down, but he and Maureen OвЂ™Sullivan looked scrumptious in their skimpy loincloths (at least before the Hayes Office came along and covered them up). He also finds his dead parentsвЂ™ treehouse (still with their skeletons) and teaches himself to read (though he has no idea how the words actually sound - or that the skeletons are his parents). Raised by apes, the child of shipwrecked English aristocrats doesnвЂ™t turn out a dearie like Mowgli in The Jungle Book but a badass killer who swings soundlessly through trees and drops nooses on his foes (human and animal). Why do filmmakers always louse up Tarzan? The 1914 Edgar Rice Burroughs book has a sensational first half, before the inevitable Victorian-EdwardianвЂ“era corniness and cultural supremacy kick in.

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